Sometimes food equals love. For my mother in law, who passed away two weeks ago, they were deeply intertwined. As the second youngest of 6 children in a poor family in Poland, they may not have had much food but their mother served it heaping with love. Throughout the the Holocaust she survived on meager rations. Years later, while learning to navigate a new country, she rebuilt her family and she cooked and baked with love as the main ingredient. Of course, portion sizes where huge and quantities unlimited. And then she’d be frustrated that no one ate enough! And you could only be on a diet when you weren’t at her house!
From her I learned to make ‘heimishe’ recipes (loosely translates to homey or old fashioned comfort foods) like potato kugel, sponge cake, matzah brei, sweet breads and chicken fricassee. Above is my take on her cocoa cake. She didn’t use an actual recipe but tasted along the way, adding a little salt here or a lot of oil there. She was happy and proud to share her recipes but it was hard to get them down on paper since she mostly felt her way through. Once I attempted to weigh and measure as she tried to accommodate my need for exact amounts. Instead of a measuring cup she used a random glass! I tried my best, figuring out the volume of that glass but halfway through this experiment she tasted the dough. Instinctively, she knew it needed more of something and tossed in more flour or orange juice without thinking that I wouldn’t know how to record the amount. I never really got that recipe right! I had more success with the other delicacies. (I have been told I make a mean potato kugel!) Randomly, years ago I found a frozen yeast dough in a local kosher supermarket and was able to recreate a similar if not identical treat. I made it today for the upcoming holiday of Sukkot since this would be a way to feel her presence and taste her love at our holiday table.
May her memory be a blessing.
Mindfully yours,
Miriam